The one that got away is now completely out of reach...

Over the past few years I've gotten out of touch with people that I once called friends or acquaintences. One of these people was a woman who I believe I had real feelings for. Our courtship was short, and our timing was off. She had two young children and I worked odd and long hours. Those problems aside, she was beautiful and smart and i believe she would've been good for me. 

Today I found out that she has gotten married, and is of course happy. She deserves happiness. Any woman who has ever been with me, for a period of time, who has treated me as well as I treated her, deserves the happiness that I couldn't provide for her. Though I wish her the best like any man a part of me is saddened that I wasn't the man to win her heart, be her champion and husband. 

Maybe I'm not the right man for anyone. I'm still too selfish and self important. The current women I'm involved with are treated with all the kindness I can muster. I make a concerted effort to please and show them respect but I'm no white knight and I probably will never be the kind of man they would want to stay with/marry.

Contratulations to the one who got away! Maybe I'll get lucky and fall in love again and allow myself to suspent disbelief and disillusion to want the cliche of the Nuclear Family.